ini lirik lagu okay :P

Aku ingin engkau ada disini
menemaniku saat sepi
menemaniku saat gundah

berat hidup ini tanpa dirimu
ku hanya mencintai kamu
ku hanya memiliki kamu

aku rindu setengah mati kepadamu
sungguh ku ingin kau tahu
aku rindu setengah mati

meski tlah lama kita tak bertemu
ku slalu memimpikan kamu
ku tak bisa hidup tanpamu

aku rindu setengah mati kepadamu
sungguh ku ingin kau tahu
ku tak bisa hidup tanpamu
aku rindu…

lagu d masiv, rindu setengah mati

layann kan aje :P

mari merepek

it's the mixed emotions again. hehe

barely have time to update sebenarnya but have loads to tell

tapi rasa macam malas pulak

i am now in the middle of reading about sequeale of gallstones.

pastu rasa mengantuk. kemudian rasa nak makan pau.

memang lah boom boom paw! :D ehe (merepek. kan)

i had my family dinner last weekends. it was awesome

abah treat us for dinner sempena an achievement. tapi tak boleh la cakap ape. hehe

we wore all blue :) significant? takde pape pun, just nak nampak harmony aman and makmur mcm tuh. hehe

it was fun, everybody were there, well except for my niece yang kat tkc tuh. and my BIL in dubai. pity themmm.

oh malas lah nak upload gmbr, tengok la kat fb kan. hehe.

my exam is coming. i have 3 more days untuk sumbat2 surgical knowledge dlm kepala

berazam ingin do my best for this posting, mcm bersemangat sangat lah. hehe

i'm gonna do my best oh semua examiners! wait for mee. ewah! :P

professional 3 is just in 80 plus days. cuak kan.

so seriously apologize again if i susah sangat nak contact. hehe.

ive been ignoring ym, handphones juga at times

hehe

oh, semalam 25th january was our 11th anniversary of friendship. sudah 11 tahun kita kenal kan. i love u to bits my dear glace!! rinduuu sangat!!!

and oh, i miss az, dila, efie, arock, pipot and semuaaa lahhh!

:/

and oh, congrats sekolah seri puteri, sudah jadi top 20 schools in malaysia

i'm proud! hehe

okay dah penat. nak sambung belajar

wait for my update after exam.

ive got shawls to sell.

she sells shawls in her blog. hehe.

wish me luck ppl :*

takdir.

a patient was admitted to SH

main complaint was of upper abdominal pain, radiate to the back

he's 20 years old, previously fit and well.

no other complaints

on examination

he was found to have abdominal mass

with dullness all over the abdomen.

the probable liver span was 24cm. but the area of dullness was from the 2nd intercostal space of the right ribs up to right iliac fossa

Thraub's space was dull

on lung examination

there was reduced air entry, more prominent on the right, reduced vocal fremitus

presence of stony dullness

no added sound.

apex beat was displaced, at the 6th intercostal space lateral to midclavicular line

they suspected lung collapse (atelectasis).

some even suspected right pleural effusion which have pushed the liver downwards.

but investigations revealed probability of LUNG CANCER

lung cancer in a 20 year old, with no history of smoking whatsoever, sangat rare.

he was admitted on weekend of 10th/11th january

was well throughout the admission

does not have pain, only mild pain.

was very cooperative eventhough we repeatedly disturbed him by repetitive examinations

and....

last saturday, 17th january 2010

he passed away.

complained of shortness of breath at 8pm

collapsed at 9pm.

resuscitated by 2 attempts of cardio-pulmonary resuscitation

but he never regained the consciousness

was pronounced dead

we were so shocked

he was so well. so nice.

and he's only 20.

supposed to be in his final semester in his diploma of electronic engineering

sedih.

memang semua ini kerja Allah

ajal, jodoh, maut semua di tangan Allah

tapi tetap terkejut.

mungkin Allah lebih menyayangi.

sebab itu senang sangat dia pergi, kan?

he didn't suffer from the illness that bad.

cuma sedih jugak.

sebab he was the youngest child

and he passed away alone, parents were not around mase tuh because bukan visiting hour

let's all recite al-fatihah and yassin to him

semoga arwah ditempatkan di syurga. Amin.

i have to prepare emotionally to face death more frequently, no? huhu :|

let's call it a day!

i should be going to sleep. it's been a real productive day. went to the hospital, clerk cases, did physical examination, found interesting findings of the patient, went back to college for my nap.hehe. then went for roti nan cheese with ayam tandoori, did my case write up (almost almost finsihing.hehe), prepared history for tomorrow's ward round and bedside teaching, did mcq for tomorrow night's latih tubi, read up on few subtopics. fuhh. i should be exhausted now dont i? hehe. but maybe i'm in my manic phase, the adrenaline rush is just there. kan bagus kalau hari2 macam ni? hehe

nway i am so happy with my life now, not because of anything of a particular reason mind you. is feels good to be this way. hehe. talking about being single, i used to think that being single would be the last thing that i wanna do. hehe. but, i am now enjoying every second of it. it feels soo good! and i am not exaggerating it ok. if i know it would be this refreshing, i would have chosen to be single a long time ago. hehe. :P

and since my life is so so busy right now, i barely have time to go through all the emotional package of being involved. like getting into a fight every now and then, having to jaga hati insan2 tertentu. and then u have to justify yourself whenever you ran late going back to college. i left that routine for quite some time now.

initially, sure i kinda miss the routine calls, like the feeling that someone of a different gender actually cares for you, all those sweet words. (haha) but after quite some time, i get used to the changes. sure i got no texts in the middle of the night, or the sudden urge to call him in the middle of night, hence disturbing my sleep, hence disturbing my concentration ability for the next morning. poyo kan? :P

i am now also more free in spending my money the wiser way. NOT! haha. bila shopping tuh, all i care about is myself right now. i wanted to buy things for myself, and i dont have to even think about buying something for him. hehe. jimat kannn? :D

and oh, i made new friends. i am so free to flirt with anyone. seronok kan (*GRINSSS* ) eh ter-Caps Lock pulak. hehehe

see, it's all soooo refreshing! :)

ok people, let's call it a day, shall we?

ps : malam tadi mimpikan arwah. pagi tadi terkejut sebab ingat ade call coming from arwah. lupa plak, kalau dah arwah mana boleh main telefon2 lagi. ingat vampire ke ape. huuuu

pps : i think you missed me, dont you?

about three idiots. :)

so i went to watch this movie. hindustan movie tauuu. :P hehe. unexpectedly, the movie was awesomee! sangat seronok! serious tak tipu. i had fun watching it, sampai rasa tak larat nak kuarkan suara untuk gelak. dan tak larat nak tahan air mata from bergenang2 :P hehehe

anyways, this 3 idiots movie was initially recommended by our lecturer, dr jeya the cardiologist. hehe. mcm comel je ade movie kene recommended by lecturer kan :P so bila ade few of my friends yang pergi, semua balik2 pun cakap best gila lah semua kan. so i became excited lah nak tengok, but couldnt find the time since the schedule is packed. huhu

but, managed to squeeze some time yesterday evening selepas kelas, terus struggle buat soalan2 past year exams untuk discussion belah malam. pastu terus pergi tengok movie. tapi dekat brem mall je. hehe.

the movie started at 3pm. we went ber-sepuluh orang. 10 idiots went to watch a movie. hehe. 6 guys, 4 girls. meriah betul. the theatre was almost empty lah. ade dlm 4 couples lain, and us. hehe. so macam seronok gile gelak tak ingat dunia. boleh la conquer kan :P

the movie ceritanya simple je, very light, memang u just need to sit back, relax and enjoy. tapi kadang2 kena gak lap air mata pastu pura-pura mata masuk habuk. hehe.

it was about 3 guys, engineering students mereka ini. they met each other masa masuk school of engineering tu la, and they became close. their friendship memang one of a kind lah, they sacrifice almost everything for each other. memang sweet lah. the true and real friendship. sampai rasa nak nanges je tengok. kemudian along the way tu, one of them memang tak minat sangat lah with engineering but he did it anyway because of his parents. so his friend ni made him see that his real passion is in photography. the other one, memang lah minat engineering but because he always fear about whats going to happen tomorrow, he cant focus on today. paham ke? :p

and the hero, aamir khan. comel gile! hehe. lama tak tengok die berlakon kan. he's a very bold man. very straight forward and berani. he questioned his dean yang sangat old skool tuh. sampai memang the dean hates the 3 of em so much. and byk lah aksi2 yang best dalam cerita ni.. best ok! :D sila lah tengok sendiri

and oh, ade kareena kapoor.. she's a medical student. (ahem :P). and die ni mestilah girlfriend aamir khan kan, as expected. but serious serious, tengok la cerita ni. ade moral values tahu.

among the things i've learnt is that success isnt always based on academic qualifications. to be successful, we must do the things we love with passion, then success will come your way. and we shouldnt learn something just for the sake of remembering for exams only, we should enjoy the process of learning :) hehe

ok. i nak sambung belajar. and oh, i am now busy trying to collect past years questions from other universities. ada yang nak bagi saya tak? :)

..

i am now coming to an end of my current posting and that means, i only have ONE more posting left! before my final professional exam.

grrrrrr T____T

now i wish to turn back time, so that i'm gonna make sure that i didnt just waste my time on certain things. but yeah, it's gone. uhu.

cuak nya tak tau lah nak cakap. so sekarang officially i'm declaring myself to be a nerd! yes, i've called my parents, and told them that i wont be back home selalu sgt. i've to make sacrifices untuk kepentingan masa hadapan. so now, i really wanted to say sorry to my friends, because apparently i dont have much time left untuk berjumpa. kita jumpa nanti okay? selepas saya tamat belajar, boleh? :)

so my schedule now is full. penuh sangat. we officially made a gerak gempur latih tubi terkawal. hehe. comel kan nama dia? :p oh, that's my study group punye activity. tolong doakan kami ye semua.

and i havent made up my mind untuk mintak housemanship di mana. errrr. ingin kerja di sekitar lembah klang saja. tapi takut jugak kalau2 tercampak jauh nun di sabah sarawak kee. wawawa.

sebenarnya takut lah bila nak habis belajar. banyak sangat expectations dari orang sekeliling yang harus dipenuhi. tapi at the same time rasa seronok, untuk go through a different phase of life. a working life, walaupun most probably it will be tiring and so time consuming. but nak buat macamana kan. that's my fate. and that's what i have to go through. sepatutntya rasa thrilled gila sebab it's a dream come true (insyaAllah). kalau tak sangkut di mana-mana. in few months time je lagi, one of my dream is finally coming true. sebab it was always a childhood punya imagination to be a doctor. kenapa eh bila kecik-kecik dulu mesti nak cakap nak jadi doctor, but when we're that close to that so called dream, semua orang akan keep on tanya, kenapa lah i took this field. huhu. but apa-apa pun, i am happy. bersyukur sebab Allah tunaikan semua cita-cita and impian. insyaAllah.

okay. mahu belajar. penat sebenarnya. tapi i dont have much choice kan. hehe

please pray for me. and i'm sorry kalau ada buat salah pada sesiapa.

i've come to love medicine. and i'm gonna make sure i'm gonna love my future as well.

whatever happens, medicine is my destiny. :)

sorry lah macam poyo sedkit. ini untuk motivasi diri sendiri. hehe

take care people

pergi.

sayu terpisah

hikayat indah kini hanya tinggal sejarah

berhembus angin rindu

begitu nyamannya terhidu wangian kasih mu

hujan lebat mencurah kini

bagaikan tiada henti

kaulah lagu ku

kau irama terindah

tak lagi ku dengari

kau pergi

sepi tanpa kata

terdiam dan kaku tak daya kau ku lupa

apapun kata mereka

biarkan kenangan berbunga di ranting usia

hujan lebat mencurah kini

bagaikan tiada henti

kaulah laguku

kau irama terindah

tak lagi ku dengari

kau pergi..

(bye-bye. pergi lah jauh. hehe)

such beautiful lyrics. boleh pulak baru nak menghayati malam tadi

akibatnya memang lah hujan lebat. hehehe :p

ps : dengar lagu kau dan aku. teringat saat2 itu.

pps: tak salahkan nak rindu sekejap. sekejap jee.

the various events

ahemm. :)

how did u guys spent your new year's eve and new year's day?

hehe. yeah, i know. isu ini sudah basi. but tak kesah lah kan.

i'm a veryy busy woman you know (sudah jadi woman. demmm. hahahaha)

neway, i started new year of 2010 with a great chapter! hehe

went out with my girlfriends (first time ok keluar malam2 new yea

r! hahaha)

buat muka bangga pleasee! :P

bukan kel

uar pergi club mana2 pun tahu. tak baik pikir2 negative. karang i brainwash baru tahu :p

went out with em to one utama at first. had dinner there. kemudian eksaited beli aiskrim baskin robbins since ade off 31%. hehe. serious rasa bloated gile lah makan aiskem.. kenyang sehhh! :p

ohh lupa i tershopping sekejap malam new year tuh. ter-beli a pair of skinny jeans. hehehe :P ter ok, tak sengaja lah maksudnya tuh! sebab saje je i nak buat year 2009 mcm memorable sikit, so sebab itu lah beli jeans itu untuk jadi my forever reminder of year 2009. hehe. logic kan?? tidak? haha. peduli apa! :P

then joined the others main pool. haha. okay sila gelak ramai-ramai. tak pandai sungguh lah. bile pegang je stick tu haruslah rasa nak gelak ketawa je sebab kekok gile! pftttt! :p

tapi saje je lah berlakon konon2 cam terer kan :p hehe. lakonan itu perlu ok. kadangkala lah :D

kemudian dah pukul 11 lebih mase tuh. baru la terkedek2 nak turun nak join countdown. tapi.....mcm tak best je kat ou sebab artists die su

me ramai chinese. tak layan lah kan. hehe. lain la kalau kitorang ni paham bahase cina. pastu baru lah decide nak tengok kat the curve. hahaha. mase itu sudah pukul 1145pm kot. macam mission impossible je nak sampai the curve tuu. but we insisted anyways. hehe. kat jalan tuh memang banyak gile lah kan kereta bersidai. uuuu. ramainye umat manusia keluar malam2 tahun baru. semua age ade.. meriah and satu malaysia sungguh! :D hahaha (jakun sebab tak pernah tahu new year mcmane :P) hehe.

kemudian masa kat traffic lite nak uturn pegi the curve tu, tetibe bunga api sudah keluar!! weeee

santek lah sangat! terus lah my friend jerit merry new year! :D :) kemudian terus suruh cik emilia yang jd driver di tahun baru parking di bahu jalan.(cewah.) hehe.

then terus kami berempat keluar kereta (lagi 4 orang dah berpecah entah ke mana. hehe)

cantik oh bunga-bunga api itu.. siap ade bentuk love lagik! tapi taktau la kenapa kan masa tengah layan je fireworks tu, tiba-tiba ada rasa touching je :p hehehe. nape ekk. rasa touching sebab kita dah tinggalkan year 2009. pastu ras

a mcm meremang-remang pulak. sebab tinggal beberapa bulan je lagi as a student. lepas ni habislah hidup. hidup entah ke mana. ecewah. berbakti pada negara. :)

seronok tengok bunga api tu. rasa happy je. campur touching sedikit. haha. senget sungguh otak aku ni dah agaknye :P bye bye 2009. semoga semuanya jadi kenangan.

lepas event tuh. balik selayang and lepak2 di mamak. ohhh. seronok sungguh i makan lagi. haha. mcmane la pipi tu tak tembam :p kate azam baru nak bulat kannn :) err, i mean tak nak lah bulat sangat. bulat sedikit sahaja. hehe

tapi kat mamak tu jumpa seseorang yang mirip wajah seseorang.. jeng jeng jeng! :p

- gambar2 kami menyambut tahun baru :)

our last new year bersama-sama. huu

okay, tak percaya kan i dah tembammm. hehe

the next day, 1st Jan 2010. pergi keluar bersama adinda ke kanda? entah tak tahu lah bahasa lama-lama nih. hehe. went out to sunway pyramid untuk sesi karaoke berkala kami. hehehe. it was on me okay. i yang belanja wanita-wanita itu menyanyi. hehe. sekali sekala kann :p

banyak oh lagu nyanyi sampai tekak rasa sakit :p tapi bukan lah nyanyi lagu rock ke kan. tak paham jugak konsep sakit tekak tu :) hehe. but jahat oh mereka. paksa i nyanyi lagu fazli zainal harapn tu.demmm :S

tak kesah pun sebenarnya. layankan aje. haha.

- me and sisters in red box sunway.. :)

-muka boring tunggu kakak dalam fitting room. hehe

kemudian..2nd January. birthday faradina kan, mcm i yang ckp kat entry before nih.

so pergi lah rumah dia, ade birthday party. nothing fancy lah, cuma close family saje. hehe. my family memang suka bergather-gather ni sebenarnye :p

i belikan dina buku fairytales collection je. hehehe. ok la kan? membaca jambatan ilmu what. :)

nways. seronok main dengan budak2. fikril and farihin sudah naik walker. laju gile fikril naik menda tu. heheh. comell je. and hariz si pipi kuih bulan pun ade. :)

ohh and gembira lah sebab mak mentua kaksu cakap i dah berisi. ye, sila tepuk tangan ok! thank u! :D

-happy birthday my dearest faradina.!

seronok masa nih. main dengan si kembar and hariz!

-sangat suka lah gambar ini. me with hariz!

xxoo :)

birthdaysss!

hello beautiful people! assalamualaikum :)

it's january 2010 baybee!

can u feel it burning? (hish ape aku merepek ni entah) hehe

nways. entry ini sekadar tribute untuk birthday girls pada bulan january.

hehe.

bukan semua org punya lah. yang terdekat sahaja.

2nd January 2010

my niece's birthday

Faradina turns 7! yayyy!

dah sekolah rendah dah. dah masuk darjah satu. comel oh dia pakai pinafore pergi school. hehe

die suke sekolah die cakap, but so easy lah (dina yang cakap ok. haha)

happy birthday my lovely niece. me loves you. :)

-ini faradina masa birthday party dia. siap pakai crown. hehe.

6th January 2010

hehe. birthday kawan i semenjak kecil. heee

cik siti nur aimi shahbudin :)

happy birthday aimi! tua ok sudah 24!!! hahahaha

selamat membesar, jgn lupa ajak aku nak kawin ok. (sob sob sob)

hehe

muahhs muahhs!! :D

-cik siti nur aimi masa kenduri kahwin cik eh puan suriana. cik siti nur aimi yang pakai baju cokelat sebelah pengantin tu. sudah berpunya. sekian. hehe

7th January 2010

birthday cik nik hanis mansor. yang ke 24.. oops tua jugak! :p

heppi birthday nicky!!

semoga dimurahkan rezeki and may u have the best birthday ever! :)

syg kau byk2 :)

birthday cik nurul akmal! yang ke......hehehe

teka lah sendiri.

happy birthday cik bestie!

hope this is a start of a good year (fingers crossed)

and hope u'll have all the happiness in the world

a love that lasts

a career that blooms

and hope our friendship grow stronger with time

so that nanti dah tua (euw)

boleh webcam tunjuk baby sape lagi comel. hahahah

i love you miss! :D

-cik nurul akmal bersama dot dot dot. hahah

di majlis kahwin rakan kami. :)

juga happy birthday untuk abang iparku yang mengambil nombor giliran yang ke-5

encik firdaus hamdan! happy birthday bro! (ceh bunyi nak ganas je kan) hahaha

semoga bertambah murah rezeki

dikurniakan anak kembar lagi. hahaha

take care of my sister ok! :)

21st January 2010

ini lambat lagi nih. birthday my niece jugak!
puteri athira will be 10 years old mehh! hehe

happy birthday in advance athira!

love u girl! :)

-cik puteri athira with her mama masa kat langkawi arituuuu. heee